I’m not gay. I’m just bored.

In which John admits that he might maybe possibly still like Travis if Travis were gay.

There is another stint of silence as Travis and John get out their cigarettes. They lay quietly on the couches and look about the room for sources of entertainment.

“Hello!” Travis calls across the room energetically, as though seeing John for the first time.

John looks on, perplexed.

“Hellooooooo!” Travis calls again.

“Hello,” John replies plainly, smiling a little.

“What do you think he would do if we just barged in there and started dancing around or something?” Travis proposes.

“I told you you were gay.”

“I’m not gay. I’m just bored.”

“That’s how people become gay,” John states.

“What? They get bored?”

“Yup.”

“That’s stupid.”

“It’s true. First you go gay, and then you start fucking animals.”

“Whatever. Who told you that?”

John shrugs.

“Gay people don’t fuck animals.”

“Not in the beginning they don’t.”

“Do you really think I’m gay?”

John nods seriously.

“Maybe I am…” Travis pauses to contemplate the thought. “Would you still love me if I was gay?”

“I don’t love you now.”

Travis looks on for a moment. “Seriously, would you still be my friend if I was gay?”

“You’re not gay.”

“You’re avoiding the question now.”

“There’s no sense in answering stupid questions.”

“C’mon—just answer the question.”

John shrugs again. “I’d make fun of you.”

Nodding approvingly, Travis lets the conversation end there.